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CALGARY, ALBERTA, CANADA
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Monday, August 23, 2004

Eye Opener Time Machine discovers election date

The Tories have rented every billboard in Alberta from October 1 through November. The 288 strong Alberta Public Affairs Bureau has cancelled all leaves as of October 1. 80 out of 83 Tory candidates have been nominated. Even George W. Bush would suspect something. Today the Eye Opener launched its TimeShip, the Nikola Tesla (See details by clicking here), into the Einsteinian universe. Mission - what will be the date of the next Alberta Election? As we upload this story, our TimeShip is just flying over Monday, October 25, 2004. TimeShip to Eye Opener: "Election date in sight. Chump announcing same." Eye Opener to TimeShip: "So." TimeShip to Eye Opener: "November 22, 2004."

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