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The Eye Opener's new time machine
The Eye Opener has acquired the latest in TMT (Time Machine Technology) ESPware - our readers may travel into the past to view Eye Opener stories from 100 years ago or travel into the future to view Eye Opener headlines from 2104

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Monday, August 23, 2004.. Eye Opener Time Machine discovers election date    

The Calgary Eye Opener
Monday, August 23, 2004

Eye Opener Time Machine discovers election date

The Tories have rented every billboard in Alberta from October 1 through November. The 288 strong Alberta Public Affairs Bureau has cancelled all leaves as of October 1. 80 out of 83 Tory candidates have been nominated. Even George W. Bush would suspect something. Today the Eye Opener launched its TimeShip, the Nikola Tesla (See details by clicking here), into the Einsteinian universe. Mission - what will be the date of the next Alberta Election? As we upload this story, our TimeShip is just flying over Monday, October 25, 2004. TimeShip to Eye Opener: "Election date in sight. Chump announcing same." Eye Opener to TimeShip: "So." TimeShip to Eye Opener: "November 22, 2004."
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ORIGINAL STORY

The Calgary Eye Opener
Sunday, June 06, 2004
The Eye Opener's new time machine
Eye Opener Time Machine

The Eye Opener 100 years ago
To allow you to enjoy Bob Edwards' wit and wisdom between 1904 and 1922, the University of Alberta's Folklore and Local History contains a collection of Eye Openers of yesteryear. Opening the collection takes a lot of bandwidth - be patient - it'll take a bit of time to display the first page of this collection - but your patience will be rewarded.

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The Eye Opener 100 years from now
The Eye Opener's time machine will whisk you into the future. The Eye Opener has acquired the very latest in TMT (Time Machine Technology) to allow you a peak into the future via Eye Opener headlines from 2104

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